Fights at Carboot Sales

**babycart** · 22-05-2008, 05:45 PM

About four years ago I took my son to one of the vinyl-free carboots here.
A German seller with a ridiculous Kaiser Wilhelm tache had a battered mandolin on the floor in front of his stall with a ridiculous price tag on it. While I was looking through some books nearby, my lad,who was five, decided to strum the strings of the mandolin gently.
Suddenly the owner screamed "FINGERN AUF!!! in his face,which understandably sent him off into floods of tears.
About five seconds later I had the guy by the jacket and had barged over half his store before his missus and other sellers intervened. He was cursing me in German, and pointing to a sign that said Nicht anfassen, so I told him in his own language that he should try using the language of the country he was in. I regret to say I also threw in some Nazi comments, too.

Please add your own carboot scuffles, chazza pagga or fleamarket fisticuffs.

**Saint Jude** · 22-05-2008, 05:56 PM

Originally Posted by babycart

About four years ago I took my son to one of the vinyl-free carboots here.
A German seller with a ridiculous Kaiser Wilhelm tache had a battered mandolin on the floor in front of his stall with a ridiculous price tag on it. While I was looking through some books nearby, my lad,who was five, decided to strum the strings of the mandolin gently.
Suddenly the owner screamed "FINGERN AUF!!! in his face,which understandably sent him off into floods of tears.
About five seconds later I had the guy by the jacket and had barged over half his store before his missus and other sellers intervened. He was cursing me in German, and pointing to a sign that said Nicht anfassen, so I told him in his own language that he should try using the language of the country he was in. I regret to say I also threw in some Nazi comments, too.

Please add your own carboot scuffles, chazza pagga or fleamarket fisticuffs.

Moderators!

Can you please move this post into the OFFICIAL 'FIGHTS AT CAR BOOT SALES THREAD'

**Rich Hero** · 22-05-2008, 05:59 PM

Originally Posted by Saint Jude

Moderators!

Can you please move this post into the OFFICIAL 'FIGHTS AT CAR BOOT SALES THREAD'

Nope!

**babycart** · 22-05-2008, 06:01 PM

Originally Posted by Saint Jude

Moderators!

Can you please move this post into the OFFICIAL 'FIGHTS AT CAR BOOT SALES THREAD'

You want some, do you? Eh? EH?

I got here first.Sling yer fucking hook.

**Saint Jude** · 22-05-2008, 06:05 PM

Originally Posted by babycart

You want some, do you? Eh? EH?

I got here first.Sling yer fucking hook.

Not fair!

I started one first. It's not my fault I'm very slow at typing and could post it until after yours.

In the true VG+ tradition, I'm going to post a thinly disguised version of your story in my thread and pass it off as my own work.

**babycart** · 22-05-2008, 06:14 PM

(Mimics in exagerrated prissy voice while mincing about)

" It's not my fault I'm very slow at typing and could post it until after yours."

**Saint Jude** · 22-05-2008, 06:18 PM

Originally Posted by babycart

(Mimics in exagerrated prissy voice while mincing about)

" It's not my fault I'm very slow at typing and could post it until after yours."

Thanks a million for bringing back vivid memories of my GCSE English teacher!

Logs off forum in floods of tears

**ginghamkitchen** · 22-05-2008, 06:59 PM

What about a 'Carboot Fight Club'. I'll take on anyone.*

* Rash offer excludes gypsies.

**mike sondek** · 22-05-2008, 08:45 PM

Remember the 1st rule of Carboot Fight Club

**Bud Peyote** · 22-05-2008, 08:48 PM

You don't talk about Carboot Fight Club - unless it's in the OFFICIAL Fights At Carboots Thread.

**el sporto** · 22-05-2008, 08:48 PM

Just thought I'd post this in both threads as I might offend someone!
I once witnessed a fight between two families at a carboot in Glasgow. It was 5.30am on a freezing cold winters morning, almost pitch dark and there was about thirty folk involved. Later, I was told it was because one family was selling the other familys possessions. I'd just pulled out a copy of the Jean-Jacques Perrey lp with Eva on it from a seller when it kicked off and everytime I hear it used on a record now I duck for cover quickly - odd that!

**peter sundae** · 22-05-2008, 09:23 PM

Originally Posted by ginghamkitchen

* Rash offer excludes gypsies.

CUNODEN

I'll fight you for a pound boy !!!

Lucky heather ?

.http://www.gamegecko.com/virtualpikey.php

Enjoy

**ginghamkitchen** · 22-05-2008, 09:36 PM

Originally Posted by peter sundae

Lucky Heather ?

Sadly, not. Come on, Minty - give her one!

**Daddy Ya Ya** · 23-05-2008, 12:49 AM

.......so the original guy comes racing up : "they're my records" ! 2nd guy to seller : "are these records sold mate?", seller : "no" ...so he carries on looking and the original dude pulls him away, knocking him over - big stand up argument ensues with pushing and shoving, and mother joins in shouting, and it's getting unpleasant and they've forgotten about the records now, and it's getting really nasty.....and then a 3rd guy turns up and starts looking through the boxes and picking stuff out.
Martin reckons he left the scene just as all 3 turned on the new guy.

He went back a while later to see if there was anything left and the seller was proudly boasting that he'd sold the lot even though his 'missus' said no one would be interested in 'that old stuff'.

Wasn't very well told really, was it ? Sorry !

**The Divine One** · 23-05-2008, 09:27 AM

Originally Posted by Daddy Ya Ya

Wasn't very well told really, was it ? Sorry !

Well, the two part format definitely had me in suspense. Mind you, I could quite easily have read part two first, ruining the whole punchline. If you excuse the pun...

A few years back a woman died at Glasgow's biggest carboot in a dispute over a parking space. Imagine it was a Vertigo collection? Aye, they take it seriously up here...

**ROCKPROF** · 23-05-2008, 10:34 AM

Originally Posted by Daddy Ya Ya

.......so the original guy comes racing up : "they're my records" ! 2nd guy to seller : "are these records sold mate?", seller : "no" ...so he carries on looking and the original dude pulls him away, knocking him over - big stand up argument ensues with pushing and shoving, and mother joins in shouting, and it's getting unpleasant and they've forgotten about the records now, and it's getting really nasty.....and then a 3rd guy turns up and starts looking through the boxes and picking stuff out.
Martin reckons he left the scene just as all 3 turned on the new guy.

He went back a while later to see if there was anything left and the seller was proudly boasting that he'd sold the lot even though his 'missus' said no one would be interested in 'that old stuff'.

Wasn't very well told really, was it ? Sorry !

Didnt realise it was the Gardiner Haskins boot.Remember getting a White Noise,Space Rituals and a few Dudley Moores for peanuts from there ten years ago.

**Rich Hero** · 23-05-2008, 02:19 PM

Maybe we should arrange a fight at a carboot sale? Babycart could dress up as Iron Fist Clive Myers and Saint Jude as Dave Fit Findlay (with Sarge as Princess Paula)? Whoever won could claim the VG+ Official Fights At Carboot Sales belt.